Ticker to Goal

Tuesday, 19 February 2013

Half term craziness

How is it that the half term week off becomes an insane week of trying to do every job under the sun?

I had coffee with a friend this morning and a lovely little snack lunch with friends after. Just as I got home and was getting ready to go to the gym, I got a frantic phone call from another friend who was stuck with her husband and 3 year old in a town 10 miles from me (25 miles from her house) with no way of getting home. They had been there for over an hour and it had taken them 2 hours to get there from London (should have taken 30 minutes). I boldly went to her rescue. I've not been to rescue somebody in quite a while. It was really exciting but by the time I got home again, I had lost all will for the gym.

How do you keep the will, when you could just give up?

Monday, 18 February 2013

Love is all around

Hello Blogland, happy belated Valentine's day. I am a very happy and extremely lucky girl. I have been trying hard with my shake diet but I haven't mastered the self restraint I showed on day 3.

Andy and I had a really wonderful 3 course dinner (Baked Camembert, lamb shanks in garlic, rosemary and red wine gravy with green veg and minted new potatoes and a raspberry, cream and chocolate topped shortbread dessert). I went to a great deal of effort. It was really important to me that I made an effort. I didn't want it to be like any other date night. I even got dressed up. He was in a foul mood though. He turned up with roses and was really sweet until I gave him his presents. Then he turned into some hideous ungrateful monster. I took the present bag back off him and only gave it back once he snapped out of it. That only happened once he realised how much effort I had put into dinner. Boys are silly sometimes. Other times they do silly sweet things that melt your heart.

Just in case you don't know, peanut butter chocolates are new to the UK. Andy has a stash of the tiny little miniature ones . I only ever have one or 2 at a time. I will be strong. I am on half term break this week. I will go to the gym every single day. I have one chocolate per day. 44 calories each. I can work that off easy peasy. It's a nice little treat though and much more helpful than his previous "just don't eat it" or "I'm not coming over if you don't go to the gym comments."

We had a proper Sunday dinner yesterday. He bought a joint of topside of beef. I can hear you all rolling your eyes. I cooked it. Parts of it was tender but, yes, I got stuck fairly quickly. And of course not just a little stuck. I hadn't noticed right away (so sue me I was hungry and not taking enough notice).  I really like that we can be open enough with each other now. The first conversation went like this:

(I get up and walk out of the living room)
A: You ok?
Me: Depends on how you define ok.
A: You going to throw up?
Me: Yep.
A: Ok. (Carries on eating dinner)

Four trips to the bathroom later the offending piece finally dislodged itself. I had managed to make a bit of a drama out of the whole thing though. I was even at one point curled up next to him on the sofa with him checking it had happened before and I didn't need rushing to A&E.

I finished at my school on Friday. I had a ton of presents and cards. These are just about half of them. Can you say spoiled rotten?

I shall miss my class like crazy. They were real sweeties but I am excited about what might or might not come next. I have so much more confidence than I did when I left my last school and I am certain I will find just the right job soon. For now I think doing some supply and not half a ton of planning and assessment stuff will be a welcome change. More time for getting to the gym on a daily basis.

Hmmmm. Maybe it's not such a good thing ;o) xx

Thursday, 7 February 2013

Day 3 aka some people are evil.

I had 3 cupcakes left on my desk over the course of today. Birthdays are a big deal when you're turning 7 and lots if families have been baking as we have been learning to weigh and measure. They are all trying to kill me with kindness, I tell you.

But no. I did not eat any cupcakes today. Nor did I smell or gaze longingly at them. I removed them and carried on.

Only 51 days until Mexico and then I shall eat cake and ice cream and bread and rice and chocolate and drink cocktails and wine and anything else my little skinny tummy desires. 😋

Wednesday, 6 February 2013

Day 2.

I've had a rubbish day. A lot of work stuff is getting on top of me and I miss Andy a ton. He calms me down without even realising it and without him to talk to, I'm getting very anxious. C'est la vie. He'll be home on Saturday. He sends me lovely looking pictures when he can and I get really jealous. Until I remember that I am going to somewhere much warmer in just 52 days!!!!

I met a friend for coffee after work. She tried to tempt me with yummy cakey goodness. I did not succumb. I had a plain black coffee and a glass of water. I did treat myself to a plain 170 g chicken breast and 40 g of cheddar for dinner at 8:30. Carb free and totally in keeping with the Cambridge shakes.

I also bought myself some ketostix on the way home and as of 8 pm tonight. I am showing traces of being in ketosis. 48 hours people. That's not bad going.

I may have bought myself a little holiday treat too.

Do you love it?

Tuesday, 5 February 2013

Cambridge Diet day 1

Yes. Today has been hard. REALLY HARD! In all seriousness though, I actually don't think its been harder than any other being good day. I had cravings that wouldn't go away but I didn't give into them which has been the only thing they have known for the last few weeks/months. I was hungry but not ravenous (thank you band).

I had a fruits of the forest shake for breakfast, apple and cinnamon porridge for lunch and a chocolate mint shake for dinner. I turned down cake and the cheese and bacon calzone I helped cook at my Pampered Chef team meeting.In my head I just keep telling myself 53 days to Mexico. 53 days to Mexico.

I know tomorrow will be harder still but ketosis cannot be too far away.

And none of this is as bad as how much I miss Andy right now. He's skiing and without wifi and so I am without texts and phone calls bar the odd snippet. I can't whinge at him when I will be away for 2 weeks but I really don't think it's fair! :o(  Please don't leave me a whole load of comments telling me to suck it up and behave like a grown up, I know I do. I am trying. Honest!

Monday, 4 February 2013

Monday motivation.

Well my new found motivation from the new year didn't last so well did they. I've been really struggling. I am fighting to keep at the weight I was when I got back from Florida in August and I go to Mexico in less than 8 weeks. Everywhere I go people are tempting me with cake and biscuits like they never have before. I cannot hold my day together enough to scrawl a sentence or 2 on here let alone work out for any extended period although I have been better at the gym than blogging.

Today, I did something drastic and very naughty for a bandster. I went to see my old Cambridge diet lady and have put myself back on a shakes and meal replacements. In all honesty, I don't know if I'm doing it because I need the sugar detox or because I need to reset the general sorts of foods I am eating. My plan is to do it for a couple of weeks and then gradually reintroduce some protein foods until I am working the keto thing Ronnie styleeeeee. Of course I may keep at it all the way until Mexico. I want AT LEAST 21 lbs off. I have some old summery clothes that will fit at that weight and some new bikinis which will look a lot better there rather than where I am now.

I haven't told A2 yet (or Andy as he will be known from now on). I don't think he will approve at all. He's skiing this week and I miss him like crazy but since I am away for 2 weeks laying by a pool and jumping in the ocean in a bikini without him, I have to grin and bear it. I've discussed it with my consultant and she thinks it might be worth if I have to eat (usually once/twice a week) I stick to a very strict carb free plan. He will understand that. My work colleagues will understand that at our work meal on Friday. I can work round that on Valentine's day. In the mean time, I can force myself to stick to this. I can. I will.

Has anyone else done a shake diet post band? Was it better/easier than pre band? I'll be posting here. I'm going to try and do something little every day.

Finally, I just want to say a massive congratulations to Ronnie. She was my major motivation in trying online dating. I hope Andy and I can be as happy as you and Stephen are. And also to Laura . You are going to be one pretty amazing mummy my girl. I'm majorly excited for you and can't wait to read all your baby blog installments.

I've got to do some catch up blogging but that will take time. Sorry if I've missed anyone. xx