Ticker to Goal

Thursday, 2 August 2012

More new numbers and the value of criticism

Firstly ... whoop whoop!

In stones
In pounds
In kilos
That's a loss of another pound and a half. Only 8 days before I leave for Disney. How much more do you think I can get off before then?

Something has changed in blogland of late. Fellow bandsters have been criticised for their deviations from diet plans and at times lack of motivation. This drives me CRAZY!!!!!! What right does anybody have to chastise others on their journey. We are human beings, adults, capable of making our own decisions. Sometimes they may not be the right ones but nobody else along the way has the right to be critical to the point of nastiness. We need to support each other. Mocking, shouting, stamping feet and throwing a wobbly because someone does not follow your perceived notion of the rules does not count as support. At least not in my book.

I wrote to one of the culprits, in defense of a fellow blogger and tried to explain kindly (as I am of the you catch more wasps with honey camp) that unkindness does not make people more motivated. As a part of this I congratulated him on his own massive weight loss and asked him if his journey had been easy. I tried to make the point that understanding where people come from is important and you cannot make huge sweeping judgements. In his response he tried to imply that their decisions were akin to taking illegal class A drugs. I'm guessing he isn't a big believer in no food is bad for you if you eat it in moderation. HEROIN? SERIOUSLY? No friend of mine takes drugs of that level in any quantities and if they did, I wouldn't just say something, I would do something. However pizza, cookies, ice cream, alcohol even cigarettes are not illegal even if you think they should be. Someone slipping and eating or drinking some of these foods does not constitute a crime and I maintain that they need encouragement to keep trying and fighting tomorrow. I shall provide that. I shall tell my friends and fellow bloggers that yes they slipped, but get up and try again before it gets worse. I shall say that I love them and care about them, pray and cross my fingers for them to do better from now on. I shall remind them of how far they have come and the challenges they have faced because I have actually read about their battles and know what it takes for them to do this. None of us are perfect! Catherine has described her food and alcohol choices. Amy W. frequently tells us of the slips she has had and the battle to stay at her goal. Even Lap Band Gal told us how she ate chocolate peanut butter pie last weekend. I myself have detailed more than one battle with my own internal cookie monster. We (or at least I) chose the band in part so that I could choose to eat a little of these foods from time to time. I did not want to be made physically ill by a particular type of food. I have not read about his journey so I shall not make assumptions but he told me it was not easy and he still has a way to go. I would therefore like to refer him (if he is reading this) and you to the main point I made in my original message to him.
People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones!

13 comments:

Z said...

Very well said and super great on the loss!

Nikki609 said...

You hit the nail on the head. This is a journey, its not going to be all ups! You should be allowed anything in moderation and even if you overindulge you shouldn't be chastised for it. Obviously we chose this journey and we aren't going to make the best choices all the time. Class A drugs, Really???? Someone has issues...lol...oh well...to each their own, but I am of the same mentality as you...help them by encouraging words not derogatory comments...Have a fantastic day!

adorkbl said...

Congrats on your loss!

((hugs)) sweets.

I really had to wash my brain of all the craziness and carry on business as usual. I refuse to get swept into a circle of untruths and trying to justify myself to someone who apparently is perfect and has never slipped up once on their journey.

Not everyone has to love us... but compassion for each other during our journeys would be a nice thing.

Michelle said...

I'm smiling from ear to ear right now! You go.

vickyd said...

Well said! I haven't seen the post in question, but that's not someone I would be interested in following. The first thing that comes to mind when I hear from people like that is "The lady doth protest too much, methinks"...I wonder if his diet is completely free of Class A drugs...

trishajo said...

FABULOUS thoughts girl!! A++++


I wasn't "lucky" enough to get a reply. DARN.

And I love the fact that you took a pic with lbs too- cause otherwise I am lost as to how the heck much you weight!! haha ;)

Lap Band Gal said...

Amen sista! :) well said.

PS: Disney will be SO MUCH FUN!!! :)

MandaPanda said...

I have a guess of who this is and he's been blocked from my blog for ages. This goes around every 6 months or so where he gets on a roll calling people out for bad choice. There's a difference between tough love and just being an ass. Well said!

RockBand Barbie said...

Amen sista! I read those posts...it saddens me when people are so judgemental. I hope you have a blast at Disney!!!

Maria said...

Love this post!

Andrea said...

You are rocking the weight loss. Congrats!

Ronnie said...

You know how I feel about the response. Very well-crafted and thoughtful. No one should be judged for what they eat, because even the best of 'em eat things in private they're too proud to admit on their blogs.

I don't deal with bullying, either. Blah.

tz said...

wow...since I'm relatively new to this game, I have yet to see something like that. It's too bad since WLS and WL blog community has seemed so helpful. I think I would be crushed to read something like that. I've been so surprised by the support and warm wishes of almost everyone I've encountered in this 'community'. Thankfully, I believe, that most people are like this and the person you speak of is the minority...

But to the important stuff -- CONGRATS on your weight loss. That's awesome!